With my mind on my money and my money on my mind

So a while back my department chair sent me some announcement that Snoop would be playing at the local dive bar here last February or so.  Apparently some of his (D-to-the-O-to-the-double-G, not the chair's) family is local but I think the chair wanted to make me feel like Starkville, MS is on the map.  Which it is but only, you know, LANDSAT maps.  Or whatever.  Anyway, I replied to the chair's email with some comment about how Snoop and I go way back, referring to trick-or-treating at his house.  Now, in my head, I was thinking of how Pomona students used to try and approach his Claremont McMansion only to be stopped at the driveway by the security detail.  Also, he'd sometimes play pickup basketball on the court down near Wig Beach.  So, he was, like, around.  But I don't think I ever saw him from anything closer that afar.  This is why I will have a great career as a historian.  I exaggerate connections in an effort to inflate the importance of my commentary.

Well it turns out the chair, big gossip that he is (like, in every way, I think he's 8 feet tall), has spread the rumor that Cordozar Calvin Broadus Jr. and I basically grew up together in Long Beach, playing checkers, braiding each other's hair, etc.  And I heard this from a grad student, not from the chair or some other faculty member.  This is no controlled burn obediently stopping at the cleared-brush zone.  Its made the jump to the student population.  Wonderful.  I anticipated being treated like a bit of an exotic species here, being from the west coast and all, but really, this is not the LA I'm from.  And he has family here!  What if someone stops me in the ketchup aisle (yes, there is an entire aisle devoted to ketchup) at the Piggly Wiggly's and calls me out!

So now I feel like I need to do some damage control.  Maybe I'll request some time at the upcoming faculty meeting.  I thought I could do some neutralization work at the informal College of Arts and Sciences happy hour this evening but it didn't go down after all.  Bah.  Next week.

Yes, I generate new things to worry about out of thin air.

The other consequence of not getting trashed with the Deans tonight is that I now have a quiet evening ahead of me to take my newly-tuned piano out for a spin.  It took the blueberry farmer four hours to get the piano back up to snuff (yes, the blueberry farmer strikes again - he was the musician for the new faculty reception the other day too and is, in fact, the glue that holds Starkville together) though the last hour of it was basically a tutorial on playing blues piano.  Which was awesome.  He was showing me all sorts of different styles and which how to nail the blue notes and all that.  We might meet up in a few weeks to play a bit.

I'm SO excited.